Danger Puppy is still out of commission for the most part. And Chaos Boy is busy being gainfully employed. For your entertainment, here is a digest of our text messages for the past week:
CB: Lil Broffalo wants archery gear for Christmas. He’s totally down with the Doomsday Prepper thing. 🙂
DP: LOL. That’s why he’s my Kentucky Kinfolk!
DP: Gonna need a ride?
CB: No danke. you stay in puppy heating pad mode.
DP: How do boy get home?
CB: Perambulatory transport
DP: You must REALLY love a puppy.
CB: LOL! Oh it’s da troof
DP: Don’t talk to the bums.
CB: Nah! I ain’t a skerta no bum!
DP: Puppy ib!
CB: I’m a big boy.
CB: I’ll kick em in the ding ding and shit on em!
DP: That escalated quickly.
DP: Bulging discs, sciatica. Waiting for Prednisone and Tylenol w/ codeine. Recheck in 2 weeks.
CB: My poor sweetie.
DP: A couple of different nerves are pinched.
CB: Anything I can do to help?
DP: Shoot me.
DP: If there’s no soap in the shower does that mean I’m supposed to skip it?
CB: That means I’m a dipshit.
DP: It made me feel less bad about dropping one of the trimmer attachments in the potty and not going in after it. 🙂
DP: Holy shit! I just learned something new: “cunt stachel.” I can’t wait to use it!
CB: Wow! Love it.
DP: I’m supposed to ask you about spacedocking.
CB: Lil Broffalo & Sir Cheeto are some bad, bad men.
DP: I’m aware.
CB: Did they tell you about the Golden Homer?
DP: Ain’t nothin more fun a human being can do on this earth than frog catchin.
DP: Duck Dynasty is a philospher’s dream. “Sex of boudin? Let’s go with the boudin!”
DP: You should take a few days off soon to decompress.
CB: No shit
DP: I would be your buddy.
CB: Thunderbuddies for life! Fuck you, Thunder! You’re just God’s farts!
DP: BTW, my back doesn’t really hurt. I’ve been faking so you’d take care of me.
DP: Really? No spanking?
CB: I have to be in the office by 0615 tomorrow. I’ll be bussing it.
DP: Oooo. That’s icky. I can take you. I’m a fucking sweetheart.
CB: You sure are! And I love you a bonch!
DP: Nice how that works out, huh?
CB: Yup. 🙂 ❤
CB: <Nekkid Dance>
CB: <Waving Noodly Appendage>
CB: U rok. Which is different from The Iraq. And such as.
CB: Dude, I’m on a roll today!